Jan 09 2011

Adjustments

(I wrote this post on Dec. 26 and forgot to publish.)

Life with Vivienne in our household hasn’t been nearly as much of an adjustment as I first anticipated. Sure, it’s still early. But it’s going really well!

Johnny seemed to be really out of sorts in the day or so before she was born. Maybe he sensed something was really up. Wild animals can sense when crazy weather is coming their way, so maybe toddlers can sense when their moms are about to go into labor.

Johnny had a blast with Renee but he didn’t get much rest (she told me he dozed off at the kitchen table! That’s never happened!) but he was really fighting sleep and didn’t take a nap in a normal way. And he didn’t go back to sleep after his 4 a.m. wakeup call on her birthday. Yikes. When I saw him at the hospital late in the evening, he was way past exhausted.

He wasn’t sure about things. He seemed like he was kind of irritated at me being away from him all day. It was the longest we’d ever been apart. By a lot. He didn’t want to come up and see me at first.

I missed him so much, and when he left me at the birth center I couldn’t really look at him. It was just a bit emotional for me. I knew the next time I’d see him, he’d be a big brother and things would definitely be different.

He seemed a bit interested in Vivienne while we were in the hospital, and he thought her sneezing fit was hilarious. Didn’t really want to touch her, but he did want to look her over. Oh, and he spent a long time at the sink washing his hands when he first got in the room, because that is a fun game.

It was hard when Shane and Johnny left that evening. They were both wiped out and I needed my rest, too. I cried when they left. Hormone drop, I swear! But I wished I could go with them.

He was more excited to see her the next day, and then on the third day when they came to bring us home, he was really ready to come get us! Shane tells me that in the morning, he got up and got his coat and was talking about me. They walked into our room and he was ready for me to put her in the car seat.

The guy won’t sit still long enough to really hold her, but he tries sorta. He likes to pat her head and hold her hand. He says “bless you!” anytime she sneezes. When she cries, he says “crying!” He’s a good assistant for diaper changes and he goes running for the changing table every time I mention that she needs changed.

I asked him to get her some socks, and he enthusiastically grabbed a pair.

He was playing with one of his trucks and I was holding Vivie. He brought the truck to me, said, “Trade!” and set it down on my lap and reached out to hold Vivienne. Hahahaha!

Another time, Shane was holding her, and she started to cry. Johnny was sitting by me and he says “nurse!” and wanted me to adjust my nursing tank and then he wanted Shane to give Vivie to me right away. Johnny got up and stretched out his arms like he was going to carry her over, and he held onto her while Shane passed her to me. So sweet!

I don’t think her crying bothers him — I think he just wants her to be happy.

He isn’t really showing signs of jealousy or negativity toward her. Overall, I think he’s handling this big change really well.

I’ve tried to make sure I get some one-on-one time with him throughout the day, and Shane does the same. He and I cuddled and took a nap together once just like ‘old times.’

Though I’ve said, “I love you,” many times, Johnny never quite got the phrase down to say back. The other day, we asked if he loved Vivienne and he said, “love” and smiled. I think he gets it.

Seeing him in this big brother role has been so precious. It’s going to be a lot of fun to watch them grow up together. I hope they’ll be life-long friends!


Update on Jan. 9: He STILL loves his baby sister so much! He is so sweet to her. He was accidentally rough with her a few times, trying to give her a toy or hug and so she’s had a few little bonks, but nothing that left a mark. Phew. I really don’t think he means to hurt her, he’s just excited and doesn’t know his own strength.



4 Responses to “Adjustments”

  1. Aw, so sweet :-). Glad everything is going well for you. I’ve been thinking of you and keep intending to e-mail and see how things are, but never did, so it’s good to get an update!

  2. Oh dear! I read the “love” part, and…I cried :) Glad you are all adjusting well. Especially glad it’s been easier than you thought it would be! Blessings!

  3. So sweet. Roanin is still consistantly great with Cora 9 months later. He hurt her on purpose once, but that’s it. I was really afraid of him being jealous, too, but it just never happened. I think 2ish years is a really great spread. I hope it is for your family, too. (So sorry I couldn’t get the poor boy a nap. There was just so much going on in his life that day!)

  4. so cute.

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